One of the best aspects of my business is that I get to do a lot of networking. Some groups I attend have a one-seat policy, some allow anyone from any business to attend, some are membership organisations and some operate a drop-in system – all perfectly great groups each offering something slightly different.
However, I fell in love with one particular group and now host three groups for women in business only. I often get asked by men why there is a need for groups that exclude them, so I want to explain.
Do I hate men? No, I don’t. On the contrary, I’m blessed with a loving husband and an awesome son, to name but two males in my life that I adore.
For me, networking is all about building lasting and meaningful business and personal relationships, and this is where I find men behave differently to women. Men aren’t better or worse at networking than us; they just have contrasting approaches.
It’s all in the mind
A man’s brain is more compartmentalised than that of a woman. That’s why a man is more likely to get straight to a point in conversation at networking events. On the other hand, a woman will engage in small talk, searching for that common ground to work out whether mutual support can be given.
Men focus on their short-term needs; they know their goals and decide almost immediately whether they want to work with you. Women, however, are more focused on building long-term connections and friendships. Often forming smaller and deeper networks built on trust, women seek advice from their connections for personal and professional needs.
Should women think like men to get more out of networking with them?
No. In 2019, Kellogg School of Management conducted a study which concluded that women who try to network like men to get ahead actually do worse because their close inner circle of women is missing. They found that a strong female support group is advantageous to professional advancement. This isn’t restricted to networking; the support may come from a female mentor in the workplace.
Finding your tribe
If you’re considering giving networking a go, I would advise trying both mixed and female-only groups. That way, you can determine what is best for you and your business. Most groups welcome visitors, so you can go to an event to find where you feel most comfortable before joining.
Consider what you want to achieve from networking. You may feel isolated, lacking energy and inspiration and looking for friendship, collaborations, and support. Alternatively, you may be more target-driven and looking for somewhere where you will find hot leads and trusted referral partners. You may want a mix of the two.
My top tips for networking
- Look carefully at the agenda and find out what will be expected of you. You may, for example, need to do a 30 or 60-second pitch to tell everyone who you are and what you do which you will want to write in advance and practice
- Take plenty of business cards to in-person events and a notepad and pen to make notes
- Follow up with anyone you meet who you may be able to support or gain help from but also those you don’t initially see a connection with – you never know who they may know and what connections they may have!
- Don’t be pressured into joining a group you’re not sure about. Sadly, there are some out there more concerned with increasing numbers than whether they are a right fit for the person or business
About the author
This article was written by Julie Cameron.
Julie is an ActionCOACH, empowering business owners to scale-up to the next level.
She’s an experienced networker and hosts three #LoveBiz Networking communities which connect and support all women in business.